making our own light.

Find my hand
in the darkness
and if we
cannot find
the light,
we
will always
make our
own.

 -Tyler Knott Gregson-

photo(14)^ That’s my baby!! ^

It’s been twenty-nine days since I had my laparoscopic cyctectomy + oophorectomy (aka I had a baseball sized benign mass + my right ovary surgically removed through three small incisions in my abdomen). When I first received the ovarian mass news in August, I dove head-first into an assumption about how scary & terrible my life would be from that day forward, through the surgery & recovery period.

Five days and four breakdowns later, I decided to change the way I looked at things (as Wayne Dyer would say!). Instead of resisting the news and thinking about it as “ruining” my prior plans, I accepted it and moved forward, choosing to learn all that I could from it, and welcoming Life with open arms…and I stopped “planning” my life years into the future [planning is in quotes because really…plans are just nice ideas until they actually happen…and it took me a long time to learn that — more on that in my next post].

Hmm…where did this new found perspective on Life come from? Well, I attribute 99% of my success in keeping my spirits up and learning how to take Life as it comes to my incredible hubsby, Eric. He is the embodiment of a calm, loving, gentle, level-headed Soul, and I was therefore able to freak-out when old fears would surface, then return to him for perspective, snuggles, and support. He was my true North, in a time when I would’ve otherwise been lost.

So, this one goes out to the Love of my Life, the Carl to my Ellie, the Peanut to my Butter [hehe], the Calm to my RARARARA, the Pickle to my Fish, the Puri to my Badger…

 Dearest Tiny Baba,

Thank you for being You. Just by Being, you bring out the best in everyone who gets to spend time in your presence, and I feel so lucky to get to share my life with you.

Because of you, your love, your support, and of course…your hilarious-ness, these few months of pre & post-oopher adventures have been incredible. Thank you for being calm, flexible, and immensely compassionate with me. And thank you for teaching me how to go with the flow and authentically detach from the outcome.

I’m deeply grateful to have experienced this ovarian excitement together, because it has given us such an incredible opportunity to deepen our relationship even further, and I’ve absolutely loved it. My appreciation for you has grown exponentially…

“and I thought I loved you then.” 🙂

We are simply perfect together. Wuv.

All ways, Always, to Infinity and Beyond, My Love.

xoxo Wifey

photo(13) ^ Thanks for this picture, Francesca! ^

Who inspires, supports, and unconditionally loves you?
How can you express your gratitude to them today?

xo Nicole

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